Last night, B and I decided to switch it up and go to a different bar since Saloon is totally out of the question. Turns out, this bar is, too.
We got there before 10pm to beat cover. That part was successful. Then we got drinks. We discovered these things that they call “We R”s, which have lots of different flavored vodkas and some sort of a mixer. Topped with whipped cream. The one I got first tasted like chocolate milk. Definitely a-okay in my book.
Then we were sitting there. And sitting there. And there were about 5 people in the whole place. Granted, it’s on the farther end of the bar stretch here, but everyone raves about this place (just on Thursdays, it turns out). After about an hour and a half, we get us some action. This guy leans over and asks what I was drinking. I had moved on to my third, which was something blueberry flavored and appropriately had a blue hue to it. Told him what it was and he goes, “It looks like Smurf cum.” That is a direct quote. I laughed it off, said no, and turned around.
Five minutes later, Guido von Douche says to me and and B, “Do you know who’s winning the World Series?” Then he tries to get us to buy him drinks and proceeds to tell B that the librarian look is really hot. Alert: guys like girls that are conservative in public and wild elsewhere…shocker!! And, for the record, I don’t think B looks like a librarian, she just doesn’t wear dental floss when she goes out. Double alert: girls don’t buy guys’ drinks. We just don’t. I don’t have money to pay for my own let alone yours!
The highlight of this was when their pseudo-normal friend comes over and tells us that GvD is loaded, shows us his Mercedes car keys (ooh I’m so impressed) and advises us to tell GvD that he looks like John Mayer. I look at him and say, “Yeah, except John Mayer is actually good looking.”
They got the hint and left soon after that. Without paying their tab. You stay classy, State College.