moda vivendi

I'm just talking to myself. We do that sometimes, me and myself.


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I need a dollar

Actually, I need a lot of dollars.  And to get them, I need a full-time job.  Note: I don’t want to leave where I currently work.  It really isn’t as bad as this blog makes it seem and the people are wonderful.  The problem lies in the fact that I have two degrees and neither says I’m qualified only to be a receptionist.

So here’s what I have to offer:

  • I can answer phones and file and fax and color code.  Usually with a smile, might I add.
  • I can set up and update social media stuff.  I do it a lot for my own purposes, why not get paid for it!  Bonus: I know how to use hashtags (ie: on Twitter only, not to use them on Facebook)
  • I’m a good writer.  I can write clever things.  I can write clever copy for your ads.
  • I drink coffee.  Essential for those long nights of writing clever copy.
  • I can work independently.  I can work in a group.  I’m a chameleon.
  • I have a professional wardrobe so I’m good to go at a moment’s notice of being hired.  And I don’t mind wearing heels all day.
  • I can recall ads from years ago.  Typically ones that were really good or really bad, so I know what to do or what to avoid.
  • I bake.  Cookies with our late night coffee and brainstorming, anyone?

I know what you’re thinking..  No one lists those qualities on job boards under the “qualifications” heading.  But they should!  Anyone can have “proficiency with Adobe Photoshop and InDesign” (which I do, in case you’re wondering), but it’s also important to be an exciting employee and co-worker.  No one wants to work with Marty McDull-Pants even if he is a photo-editing genius.  So I can do all of the professional, typical requirements and have a little fun on the side.  And provide cookies (and pie)!  Who wouldn’t want to work with someone like that?


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Adding to the awkward

As if the morning wasn’t awkward enough, I get in my car after work, turn it on, back out of the spot and blow yet another belt. I swear, my car goes through belts like it’s a fashion statement.

So a belt, an alternator, and another trip with another awkward tow truck driver later.. Here we are. I think my car is mad at me because I almost parked in a pothole at Starbucks today.

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Today has been mostly awkward

Awkward:

  • I always manage to spill my coffee all over, especially on days that I wear white.  It’s a fashion statement..?  I’m waiting for the day that I spill coffee inside my purse; I know it’s going to happen sooner or later.
  • Auto-correct.  I usually manage to send the message I intended to send with my phone, it’s when I’m using a machine that doesn’t have auto-correct that I get screwed up.  I just assume that the computer is going to insert “waiting” instead of leaving it as “wautung” or putting a period in when I hit the space bar twice.

Awesome:

  • The people I work with.  One girl just introduced me to the phrase “Awesome Possum.”  It’s like “Super Duper” but more fun to say.
  • Applying for jobs.  Just kidding.  This really belongs in the “awkward” category but I needed some padding here.


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Five adorable things I need from Etsy

I have become addicted to Etsy.  Not buying, just window shopping.  I love that it’s (mostly) all handmade products and you can choose to shop and support local artists/crafters/makers of stuff.  So here are the five things that I must have.

Cupcake Pan and Tiny Measuring Spoons on a Sterling Silver Plated Chain necklace
1. It’s cupcakes.  2. It’s mini.  3. It’s a mini cupcake necklace.  I mean, how can you not love this?!  A cupcake pan with measuring spoons on a necklace.  I’m literally out of any words, just one continual “Aww!” squeal of joy.
Find: Penelope’s Porch

iPhone 4/4s case Keep Calm Pac-Man Design
How ridiculously awesome is this?  Geekery at it’s finest.  Or, as Nadia G of “Bitchin’ Kitchen” fame would say, “Okay you newrds, check this out.”
Find: Graphic Pals

Snoopy Mac Decal
More geekery.  More squealing.  How can you not like Snoopy!?  This store also has other Peanuts-related decals and a whole bunch of other newrdy goodness.  Snow White with a hand placement right by the Apple logo so it looks like she’s holding it?  I’m all in.
Find: Sunny Luo

Set of 4 Get Together Periodically Cards
For the science newrd in your life.  I don’t know about you, but if I got this in the mail from someone, I’d meet them for lunch.  Forget Facebook; this is the perfect way to re-friend someone you lost touch with.
Find: Macey Mac Design & Illustration

Pistachio Knit Bolero/Scarf
The color is perfect for spring, and it’s practical for chilly mornings/nights.  This person’s store has many different pictures and colors but this one just spoke to me.  I love how versatile the wrap is.  Pricey (and from Turkey, so there goes my buying local thing) but very nice.
Find: Denizgunes

And I can’t talk about Etsy without plugging a Pittsburgh collective shop, I Heart Pgh!  All I’m saying is that I hope that when I get my Etsy site up and running (don’t think I forgot about my button bracelets) I hope IHP will hook a gal up.  Plus, I love the people they follow as part of their collective.  So cute and hip and perfectly kitsch.


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#yolo? gtfo.

Let me state, for the record, that I’m not usually a fan of internet “memes” or sayings.  They come as fast as they go (“Sorry I’m not sorry” anyone?) and are usually some half-ass excuse for lazy/potentially illegal behavior.  As far as half-baked acronyms go, this one is pretty bad.  “You Only Live Once?”  More like “You’re Only Looking Obnoxious.”  I seem to be on the same page as most of the Onward State team.

People are always going to find a way to validate the poor decisions they make be it “whatever,” “I do what I want,” […] or anything else. There’s always going to be some catchy phrase to blow off their responsibility. Generally the phrases are at least accepted (if not embraced) by the generation that coins them– why is YOLO an exception?

Will people continue to do stupid stuff and try to justify it with a generationally-recognized “motto”?  Yes.  Will something replace it in a week?  Yes.  Will that make it less annoying?  No.  But that’s a good question.  Why is this “YOLO” business any different than #sorrynotsorry or the like?  It isn’t. The same responsibility-shirking individuals will continue to proliferate this behavior during day-longs and Greek Week events and/or justify their actions at said events.

So why are you trying to validate your behavior?  Can’t you just do it?  It seems as if you’re only trying to justify your activities to yourself.

Sorry I’m not sorry, just sayin’.


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Thank you for being a concerned by-stander (set to Golden Girls’ theme song)

The world is constantly saving us from ourselves.  For example, the warnings on plastic bags that come with your Swedish home furnishing parts that say, “Not a toy”?  Really, they should say, “You shouldn’t be a parent if you think this is an acceptable play-thing for little Billy.”  I digress.

I found an article on Ad Age today called “Six Totally Necessary Regulations That Go Into Effect Immediately” by Simon Dumenco and was literally laughing out loud.  They are the updated, media-centric version of “Don’t play with this non-toy” for producers of said media.  So really, he isn’t saving us from ourselves but saving them from themselves.

The Contestant-Elimination Broadcast-Waste Reduction Act of 2012
Hosts of aforementioned inept-karaoke-related and inept-dance-related competitions may not draw out the announcement of any given contestant elimination for a period exceeding the time it takes for zero-revenue internet companies to become billion-dollar acquisition targets.

It’s funny because it’s true. Seriously, how many times do we get our hopes up that Ted Allen will announce who has been chopped only to have dramatic music and a commercial come up?  We know a break is coming, but we fall for the cliff-hanger every time.  I’m a firm proponent of this Act and will be writing Food Network a strongly-worded letter referencing Dumenco’s article.

So while I think of some Acts of my own, go read the article.  It’ll take two seconds and it does itself way more justice than I ever could.  The last three are my favorites.


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Awkward and Awesome Thurs–er, Friday

Awkward

  • It isn’t Thursday, even though this morning I thought it was.  It’s a good thing it’s really Friday because otherwise I would have been super-late to work.
  • I’m doing the A/A post a day late.. Old habits die hard?
  • Half-marathon training.  More like, “What marathon?  The one where I sit on the couch and read bad murder mysteries?”
  • My face is finally rebelling against all of the chocolate I’ve stuffed in it for the past few weeks.

Awesome

  • I found the best birthday present, and I found it 8 days before I needed to start panicking.
  • Stanley Cup Playoffs Round 5 is tonight.  If Pittsburgh loses, at least we didn’t get swept by Philly.  But, we shall prevail!  (Knock on wood)
  • Smash,” the TV series.  I’ve become obsessed.  Debra Messing’s hair is spectacular.  The rest of the show is pretty amazing, too.