The world is constantly saving us from ourselves. For example, the warnings on plastic bags that come with your Swedish home furnishing parts that say, “Not a toy”? Really, they should say, “You shouldn’t be a parent if you think this is an acceptable play-thing for little Billy.” I digress.
I found an article on Ad Age today called “Six Totally Necessary Regulations That Go Into Effect Immediately” by Simon Dumenco and was literally laughing out loud. They are the updated, media-centric version of “Don’t play with this non-toy” for producers of said media. So really, he isn’t saving us from ourselves but saving them from themselves.
The Contestant-Elimination Broadcast-Waste Reduction Act of 2012
Hosts of aforementioned inept-karaoke-related and inept-dance-related competitions may not draw out the announcement of any given contestant elimination for a period exceeding the time it takes for zero-revenue internet companies to become billion-dollar acquisition targets.
It’s funny because it’s true. Seriously, how many times do we get our hopes up that Ted Allen will announce who has been chopped only to have dramatic music and a commercial come up? We know a break is coming, but we fall for the cliff-hanger every time. I’m a firm proponent of this Act and will be writing Food Network a strongly-worded letter referencing Dumenco’s article.
So while I think of some Acts of my own, go read the article. It’ll take two seconds and it does itself way more justice than I ever could. The last three are my favorites.