I’d like to preface this by saying I like my job about as much as the next person. Usually I’m doing something that I think is helping the company. I have worth! I have talent! I have stress-relief balls all over my desk! (My favorites are a light bulb and a penguin.) But this “article” that I read is just begging to be satirized. It’s called “5 Reasons You Hate Your Job.” I’d tell you to go and read the full thing here, but let me break it down for you.
I’m proud of my organizational skills. Okay, my desk at home looks like a hoarder and a pack rat got together and threw up all over it, but in the grand scheme of things, it could be worse. And at work, I’m the best, most color-coded, Type A, Post-It-Noted person in the office.
So really, maybe I’m too organized. There’s no clutter to make me crazy so I am crazy in other ways.
Reason number two is because “I’m stressed.” Well, yeah, of course. When you are told to re-do something 10 times and it turns out that Version 1.0 is the winning choice, or they ask you to do something 10 times and your contributions still aren’t implemented, you tend to get a little frustrated.
You’re Not Taking Care of Your Body
Actually, I’m training for a half marathon. If I want to eat a cookie, I’m eating that cookie. Next!
You Don’t Like Your Colleagues
The author suggests that I understand that they have personal lives and stresses in those personal lives, just like me. Okay, I understand that for them, but why don’t they understand that for me!? I don’t want to be at work while you stand around and eat your cookie. Do that at home, not on my time. I eat my cookies at home after I train for a marathon. See, I’m understanding.
Your Finances Aren’t In Order
That’s why I have a job..to make money. So I’d say my finances are getting in order. They aren’t as tidy as my organizational skills, but I balance my check book.
I’d like to offer my own 5 Reasons You Hate Your Job:
- You’re Given Too Much Work and Not Enough Money (Look, that kills Reason 1, 2, and 5)
- You Don’t Like Your Colleagues (That one was pretty spot-on the first time around)
- Your Business Casual Clothes are too Binding (Casual Friday should be Casual Every Day That You Have to Put On Real Pants Day)
- You Have to Wake up Ridiculously Early (I’m a morning person, but not a crack-of-dawn, before-the-birds-are-chirping person)
- There Isn’t Enough Coffee or Whoever Made the Coffee Today Must Have Put Ashes in It (It isn’t that hard people. I know I was a barista, but come on, this is a home-brew machine, it doesn’t say “Go gather a unicorn’s tears and fill the water reservoir with them” on the instruction booklet)
And sometimes there are days when you only have 1 Reason You Love Your Job:
- Your Chair Swivels